The holidays have always been a mixed bag for me. Over the years, they’ve brought joy, togetherness, and nostalgia—but also uncertainty, stress, and that ever-present question: How do I approach this season in a way that feels true to me?
As a family, we’ve navigated varying degrees of expectations. My daughter, an only child, has grown up watching her friends in big families experience the frenzy of gifts on Christmas morning—something that’s just not part of our tradition. My husband, who values simplicity, doesn’t want gifts at all. He’s happy with one thoughtful item, but his approach often leaves me feeling stifled in my desire to express generosity toward him.
This dynamic has built over the past decade, creating a sense of uncertainty that seems to resurface dramatically each December. Last year felt like a breaking point. My mother-in-law passed away over Thanksgiving weekend, and with heavy hearts, we decided to spend Christmas in Florida with our daughter. We barely decorated—just a couple of wreaths on the front doors—and for the first time, it felt like we were stepping off the holiday treadmill.
In some ways, it was a relief. But it also left me questioning what the holidays mean to me, and how I want to show up for them moving forward. This year, I’ve found myself reflecting on that question more deeply, especially as the energy of Mars retrograde in Gate 31 (Democracy) asks us to examine what leadership means. How do I guide the energy of the holidays in a way that feels aligned with my values, my family’s needs, and my own joy?
Navigating the Holidays with Human Design
The Energy of Alignment-The Energies of Gate 26 and Gate 45
The Sun in Gate 26 (Integrity) offers a timely reminder: generosity isn’t about people-pleasing or meeting external expectations. It’s about giving from the heart, with authenticity and alignment.
The Earth in Gate 45 (Distribution) grounds this energy, encouraging us to create harmony within our communities—whether that’s your family, your neighborhood, or a broader circle of connection. This isn’t about grand gestures or performative acts; it’s about fostering meaningful interactions and contributing in ways that feel true.
Jupiter and Neptune continue to activate the Channel of Transitoriness (35-36), amplifying emotional waves and inviting us to reflect on how we embrace life’s transformative experiences. This energy reminds us that life doesn’t come with a script. The most meaningful moments often arise when we let go of control and allow the story to unfold.
A Shift in Perspective- the Nodes
With the North Node now in Gate 25 (Spirit) and the South Node in Gate 46 (Love of the Body), the energy invites us to reflect on what it means to embody love and truth. Gate 46 reminds us to root ourselves in the physical, to find the divine in the everyday moments, and to embody love in how we move through the world.
I always cherished the Christmas Eve tradition of midnight mass, especially the moment when the church lights would dim and everyone would sing Silent Night. There was something about the glow of candlelight, the stillness of the moment, and the words-“Silent night, holy night! Son of God, love’s pure light. Radiant beams from Thy holy face, With the dawn of redeeming grace…” that brought tears to my eyes year after year.
But as my spiritual beliefs have evolved and as I deepened my connection with myself I have reimagined my relationship with God as something not separate from me, but a part of me. Letting go of that tradition has been bittersweet. I miss the beauty and sacredness of that moment, but I’ve also come to understand that the light I felt in those moments wasn’t in the candles or the song—it was in me, in us, all along.
This nodal energy feels like a powerful reminder to embody that truth: that love’s pure light is within us. It’s the light we shine when we embrace life fully, as Gate 46 teaches us, through the body and the beauty of lived experience. It’s the light we share when we trust our rhythms, nurture ourselves, and show up authentically in our relationships. It is in the radiant beams from our holy faces.
Navigating the Holidays With Radical Self-Trust
This holiday season, I’m leaning into the rhythms that sustain me. I’m giving myself permission to approach the season differently, to resist the pressure to perform, and to trust my Strategy and Authority as a Projector.
For years, I decorated when I felt the pull of external expectations—the neighbors’ lights shining brightly, the nudge from my daughter, who nicknamed our house the “Bochonko House of Darkness” when she came home one year and our lights weren’t up yet. She meant it playfully but it added to my internal pressure to push myself to keep up. Now, I’m listening for the inner invitation, waiting for the moment when decorating feels aligned—not as a way to seek recognition, but as a way to bring light into my home for myself and my family.
Radical Self-Trust isn’t about having all the answers or navigating the season perfectly. It’s about being comfortable with uncertainty, knowing that your light doesn’t depend on anyone else’s expectations.
Reflect and Realign
If this energy is calling you to reflect, here are a few questions to explore this week:
- What does generosity mean to me?
- How can I navigate the holidays in a way that feels authentic to my values and energy?
- Where am I feeling pressure to meet external expectations, and how can I release it?
- What would it look like to bring more joy and light into my own life this season?
My Invitation to you
The holidays don’t need to follow a script. They’re an opportunity to connect, to give from the heart, and to create experiences that feel meaningful to you.
When you’re ready to explore your energy more deeply, I’m here for you. A reading with me isn’t just guidance—it’s an invitation to align with your truth, trust your unique rhythm, and take inspired steps forward.
The holiday light the world truly needs isn’t on your house or your tree—it comes from your heart. Shine Your Light!
